birthday...

be it two days late and a two-dollar-bill short, i still wanted to wish a happy birthday upon my sister, Arynn. she is my little mur, a [still little] girl that i have grown so fond of throughout the years. one of my only regrets [though we should tend to live without them] is that i left for college when she was 6 years old. in doing so, today as she turns 15, i realize that i have missed the majority of her life, her growing up and the path to her BECOMING an adult. by becoming, i mean that she is in no way close to actualy being an adult, which includes not even being in the same city as the ballpark to which would be in the vicinity of being said adult. however, i tis a process, nonetheless, in much the same way that when one is born they are in the process of becoming an adult. i think that this infant is the one thing to which there is a farther journey to adulthood than that of my sister. adulthood is a fleeting etherial concept in the realm to which the becoming of arynn has yet to grasp and experince. it is a sign on the side of the road which she has not passed, the exit that is a few miles off that does not quite seem to ever come. in her pursuit these past years, i continue my journey and still feel like that exit ramp on the highway of life that has adulthood has not been reached... to which it would be nice to finally get to... at least for a pit stop, some refueling and maybe doughnuts and coffee. alas, as arynn becomes, arynn is. she is my 'little little sister', or so i tell people. i miss the fact that i have missed so much of her growing up to this point, and have a feeling that this is just how it is and is going to be. for when she goes to college, i will still be a resident with one year to go. as disheartening as they may or may not be, i wonder and ponder often where she will end up for college... as i wound up staying where i went for 9 years [at least... and it could be more; who knows?] so, on this day, two days removed in the retrospective sense, i wish upon her a happy happy birthday... to that oh yes i do... and a happy happy birthday from a loving brother in hopes that we will continue to allow our relationship as brother and sister to grow with her [and my] ever-changing ways.
love you mur,
bro